Hmm, I wish I asked my friend this when I was on the phone with her. I get a lot of compliments on my baking, and I also get a lot of compliments on my e-mail demeanor. I’m professional and concise while still being friendly? Also I spell check my e-mails which apparently no one does. I’ve also been told more than once that I’m really good at getting people to open up and share their feelings - and that I can be quick to make a friend - but I have absolutely no idea how I do this and whether or not it’s actually true. Also you can feel free to insert a masturbation joke in here.
EDIT: Man I just realized I can be really good at making people laugh - everyone tells me this. Humour is my defence mechanism, so I can be hilarious in a situationally funny way. I am not good at being funny on command, but since I’m almost always uncomfortable around people, I can make some great jokes. I also usually keep a straight face when I’m telling a joke. Interestingly enough, I tell a lot of people that I write gay porn, (They’ll ask me what I write, and I say gay porn), but they generally laugh and assume I’m joking. No one believes me unless I insist, and I never insist. Anyway, I am not so good at being funny on the internet! I’m sorry internet.
Thirty four - Last kiss?
I smooched an archaeologist on a date a month ago or so! I actually tried turning my head away, but it didn’t work out and a kiss was had. We are not seeing each other anymore, but I still got to keep the chocolate, beer, and chips he gave me. I finished them off last night so I wouldn’t have to move them. Mmm, delicious.
Forty six - Favorite Disney Channel show ?
I don’t actually get the Disney Channel because I’m Canadian and I no longer have satellite, so I can’t really say anything recent. I really liked The Weekenders and The Proud Family which I think are Disney shows, and is Pepper Ann Disney? I loved Pepper Ann. She’s much too cool for seventh grade. Actually, I think I was her age when the show started, or around it. It was such a great show.
Nine (aside from writing because that's a given), twenty eight, and forty eight!
Nine- Something you do a lot?
Write e-mails? I write a ton of e-mails. I also bake a lot, and I window shop online a lot. Also you can feel free to insert a masturbation joke in here.
EDIT: WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT - I watch a ton of movies and television. A lot of times at work I can leave a show or movie on in the background, and I even do this when I’m writing, so I can really plow through TV shows and movies this way. I just love it.
Twenty eight - You need new jeans. Quick where do you go?
Ahahaha, I buy all my jeans online at the Gap. I am really tiny, so I have a really hard time finding jeans, and they changed their sizes so now they only offer my size online and then I have to go get them hemmed. Either way, I always wait for them to have a sale. This is such a weird question but I really like it.
Forty Eight - What are you looking forward to?
BEING IN MY NEW APARTMENT AHHHHHH! I’m moving out on Thursday and I’m into my new place on Sunday unless something goes wrong. It’s going to so so great.
This is a news post telling you what’s going to be updating in September - it’s a comic! - and what to expect from Nikoguy when it starts updating again on October 7th. If either or both of these things interest you, I suggest checking out the post!
Just a news post letting you know what to expect this month in terms of updates. In short, it means things will be updating, but I’m going to just deal with it week by week, so it might mean short stories, it might mean fanfiction, and it might mean new Nikoguy episodes. This week’s update will be from a guest writer.
Oh man, I have so many of these I’m kind of an idiot.
At the end of last year, I went out on a date with this guy. I had my day all planned out. I was going to go out on this date, drop my roommate off at the train station, and then run over to the post office to pick up a vibrator that I had just ordered because my roommate pretty rarely leaves and when she does I take full advantage of the situation. I realized everything might be a tight squeeze, so I told my roommate if I was running late, take a cab to the train station.
Well, I was running late, but she waited for me. I offered to give my date a ride home, but I ended up having to drop my roommate off (who was quite terse with me despite the fact she didn’t call a cab) at the train station before taking him home. (Which he was fine with.) I was pretty anxious about the whole debacle, but I was pretty determined to get this vibrator because I knew I wouldn’t be able to grab it later and that would mean my one roommate free weekend without it. So I apologized and told him I needed to make a quick stop at the post office to pick up a package before it closed.
He asked me what it was and I just sort of flippantly said it was a package from a friend and I didn’t know what was in it, just in case he opened it, I could pretend to be ignorant. That being said, I’m usually not terribly quiet about having vibrators, but this particular guy I knew to be extremely reserved about sex, so I decided to hold off on mentioning it.
Anyway, we get to the post office a minute before close, and they let me pick up my package even though they were already putting everything away. Miracles of miracles. My date asks me if I’m going to open the package, and I said not yet because it would be easier to transfer all packed up.
So I start to take him home, and it’s starting to snow and it’s dark out and the weather is starting to turn nasty. I’m still pretty worked up about upsetting my roommate, and I’m falling off a bit of a high because of managing to get the package. (Plus, it was a good date, so I was pretty excited about that.)
When I was driving, he pointed out a bicyclist on the road to me because it was getting harder to see. So I check my blind spot and start to change lanes, but I see a car speeding up to cut me off, so I swerve back into my lane and clip the bicyclist.
I pull over immediately (making sure I’m not pulling over on top of the bicyclist) and get out of the car to see if he’s okay. The bicyclist is STILL ON HIS BICYCLE and said he was fine, but to be more careful next time. So I apologize again, offer all of my information to him, but he doesn’t take it, so I get back into the car and do the only rational thing available. And that is burst into tears. (In retrospect, we think I just hit him with my side mirror, and I must have slowed down a lot when I was changing lanes because of the bicyclist, which is why the other car would have cut me off.)
So I pull over off the road into someone’s driveway and just cry and swear. And I apologize profusely to my date as well and am just generally a mess. I’m shaking so much I tell him I don’t think I can drive anywhere, but he tells me I doesn’t know how to drive my car. I told him to start talking to me about anything to distract myself and that I was going to drive back to my apartment (only a few minutes away) and I’d call him a cab and pay for it so he could get home. So with him telling me everything he hates about this TV show - Terra something er other, I manage to get back to my apartment. He carries the package with the vibrator upstairs for me, and he offers to stay for a few minutes to see if I can calm down.
I did calm down after an hour or so, and we called him a cab and got him home. He didn’t let me pay for it. I told him I totally understood if he didn’t ask me out on another date, and he laughed and said he was going to ask me out on another date and not to worry. The next day he called me to make sure I was all right (I had to drive in to work, which I managed to do just fine) and planned another date with me.
And then I lived happily ever after with my vibrator.
I was obviously really upset about this for a month or so - I know a few of my online friends managed to help me get back into working order, but I’m pretty okay with it now, though I’m obviously still very nervous about bicyclists and pedestrians on the road. But now I find the humour in the situation. In fact, this is the story (complete with the section about the vibrator) is what I told to my date on Sunday. And he gave me another date as well.
I have about ten million fears, but let’s go for the worst ones.
I am terrified of heights to the point that I get nervous standing on a chair. Sometimes escalators freak me out if they go up more than one floor at a time. And depending on the height, I can’t go on balconies or ledges and look down. Sometimes I can see into the distance okay, but looking directly down will freak me out.
I cannot public speak for the life of me. Even if I’m just standing in front of ten people I know, I will burst into tears, pass out, or throw up. (It’s never all happened at the same time.) Jerry Seinfeld (I hope it was him) has this stand-up routine about how, statistically speaking, people would rather die than public speak, and that’s the absolute truth for me. For some reason I’m okay sitting at a desk in front of people (I mean, I’m still afraid of it, but it’s not as terrible), but standing up to public speak just gets the worst reactions out of me.
And hitting a pedestrian or a bicyclist with my car is getting to be a huge fear with me. I drive through the downtown core everyday for work, and a lot of pedestrians and bicyclists in my city are not particularly considerate (or maybe aware is a better word?) of vehicles. Some pedestrians tend to just step out onto the road wherever and expect cars to just stop on a dime. I have had to swerve out of the way a number of times already because I wouldn’t have stopped in time if I hit the breaks. And bicyclists are just more of a wildcard - I have had quite a few decide to change lines and dart in front of my car despite the fact that I am going a lot faster than them. (Again, I can’t stop fast enough and I can’t always swerve out of the way.) I’m not saying all pedestrians/bicyclists are terrible and don’t obey traffic laws, but they make me very nervous when they’re on the road. I will go down a different street if it means avoiding them, and I tend to take low-pedestrian traffic roads to work. (That being said, I’m still concerned about an actual car accident, but at least if another car hits me, we’re both in cars. If I hit a pedestrian, I’m not going to be the one getting hurt - they are.)
Aside by The Weakerthans. It has been my go-to song for years. I have it in my car so I can belt it out when I’m driving. For some reason whenever it’s on, I have such a hard time not singing along. It just makes me feel so good again.
THESE ARE THE LINES I YELL IN PARTICULAR:
"I’m unconsoled, I’m lonely, I am so much better than I used to be."
"Terrified of telephones and shopping malls and knives, drowning in the pools of other lives"
"We rely a bit too heavily on alcohol and irony, get clobbered on by courtesy. In love with love and lousy poetry." (Fun fact: one of the times I saw them live, when they hit this line, everyone raised their bottles or glasses and really sang along.)
"And I’m losing all those stupid games that I swore I’d never play. But it almost feels okay."
I am a strong believer in owning it when you sing in your car.
I can’t remember. I’m currently reading Death Trick and before that I read Hidden Impact, but I am almost positive I took a break and read something in between. But what was it. I probably read a Man from UNCLE book while waiting to meet someone and then forgot about it.
Um, probably The Lion King and 101 Dalmatians (obviously the cartoon). I really want to say Victory through Air Power, but I probably sound like a dick, so we’ll say The Fox and the Hound. I was never into the Princesses when I was a kid (except Mulan because come on it’s great), and I’m more interested in them as discourse now. But I was and always will be into cartoon animals.
Oh man, Treasure Planet. I don’t even know where to put that. And let’s pretend anything jointly done with Pixar doesn’t even count. I am just going to stop here before I regret everything and rewrite all of this.